HELP ME – I’M TRYING TO DEAL WITH THE AGEING PROCESS

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I decided to write a book called, ‘The Visible Woman – More Lust, Less Must’, because of my own experience and the experience of other women in my personal and professional life.

In my book, I mentioned the role that the media plays in the ageism view.    It helps society to see
us as needing something done to us so we fit in with their view of women once we reach mid-life.  Also though, I said that women had to look at their role in colluding with this viewpoint.

Media

I don’t understand how the media think that ageing is a problem to be solved.  Yes, they do put some older women in the papers e.g. Dame Helen Mirren, but always with something like, ‘Look how good she is for her age!’ and then gets some expert to comment on whether she has had work done – it is just crazy!!!   Enough of this nonsense, is what I say.

I want to bring up what some well known women have said in the media –

The Presenter, Mariella Frostrup, claimed that ‘the unwelcome development (turning 50) had improved her ‘work-life balance’ but hit out against ageism, calling it ‘the last frontier of acceptable discrimination’…. There are plenty of forgotten women out there not so lucky’.

The Actress and Writer, Emma Thompson, who happens to be 55, was asked if 50 was the new 35.  I absolutely adored her reply which was –

‘Can I just say very loudly bollocks…………………………….. People wanting to be 35 when they’re 50 makes me think: Why?  Why don’t you be 50 and be good at that?’

For me, she’s saying accept yourself and stop trying to be someone else!

Role Models

Isn’t it fantastic that someone comes out with her truth and doesn’t pay lip service to what the media wants.  In my opinion, Emma Thompson is standing up for all women who are told to look and be younger by any means possible.  She is a Role Model for generations to come.  She’s not willing to enter into the game that the media, and society, are playing in the ageing process!

We will all get old – if we’re lucky to survive.  I don’t know many who have not wanted the wisdom they now have to be transferred to that younger self, and still are not afraid of the ageing process.

Care for Self

It is really important that we all take care of ourselves as best we can and even within our financial constraints.    It is the same tips that apply to most of life –  make sure you have some daily Exercise; Drink lots of Water;  watch what you are Eating;  Dress to suit your body;  Mix with all ages;  Be a Lifelong Learner;  and have a good support system around you.  And, of course, you have a choice in dealing with ageing in whatever way you want to.

The best one for me is Smiling and having a real Belly laugh!   We exercise more facial muscles then.  People respond to someone who is smiling and laughing and take no notice of their age!

Contentment

What happened to the ‘being content with yourself’?   The looking in the mirror and saying, ‘I really like or love you because of your spirit regardless of any lines’.

If, as is said, we are here to further the evolution of consciousness, then why are we all hung up on the ageing process?????   How is that helping our growing awareness?

Focus

We are all going to die -one way or another!!   So what are you going to do about it?  Why not focus on becoming yourself – acceptance of you in all your glory?     Why waste your  time and money on futile things.   Will you look back on your deathbed and say – well at least I made myself look younger??

No – you know you won’t.    Let’s make ourselves the best we can be in order to make the world the best it can be.   Who is up for that???????????

It’s time to give the focus on the ageing process a break.    Yes, we may be frightened of getting old but the alternative is death so grow old gracefully or disgracefully.

Start by accepting and being content with who you are – as that contentment shines through to others and they respond.

Look forward to hearing from you x

 

 

As a Counselling and Coaching Psychologist who comes from a place of acceptance, contact me for a chat or sign up for my next Residential Retreat.

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